Premarital counseling (also called pre marriage counseling or pre engagement counseling) is designed to assist couples who are considering a long-term commitment to each other. Premarital counseling offers support and guidance to the two of you in looking at problems—or potential problems—with the goal of helping you work through those areas of disagreement or friction.
Also, pre marriage counseling is intended to assist the two of you in making sure you have the wisest and most effective set of intimacy skills possible, giving your relationship the greatest chance of succeeding long-term.
How Does Premarital Counseling Help With Intimacy Skills?
Most of us know that we can get angry or reactive during an argument, or that a seemingly minor issue can lead to a big blowout between the two of you. And blowouts frequently have an afterlife and don’t go away quickly or easily. Not all of us handle such situations well. We can get insulting, name-call, pout, use cold silent treatment, withdraw sex, yell, get icy or remain angry for long periods of time. And most of us also know that these are not loving or wise ways to behave toward someone we care about and value, not to mention that these behaviors may injure the closeness, connection and trust between you.
Pre marriage counseling will offer the two of you an extremely effective set of relationship skills. Included in this set of skills is the ability to effectively communicate and resolve disagreements, conflicts or differences. But also, good intimacy skills require the two of you to compromise, negotiate and successfully problem solve together.
In addition, intimacy skills include the ability to respectfully listen—even when you don’t agree, along with exploring what will create the best environment for the two of you to live compatibly with each other. Benefit of doubt, the assumption of good will, the absence of malice and ways to diffuse anger are also vital intimacy skills, as are effective ways of diffusing hurt feelings and working through resentments. Premarital counseling will assist the two of you in gaining these skills.
Pre marriage counseling will also address the importance of affection, wooing and romance—and how to handle when the two of you have different sexual appetites, or a different need for affectionate (non-sexual) touch, or different ideas about what romance means—and how to be sensitive and tuned-in to your partner’s feelings and needs on these subjects.
What Issues Are Most Frequently Addressed in Premarital Counseling?
Depending on the couple and the age of the couple, children can be a big issue. Other big issues may include having different priorities, money conflicts, time spent together (or the lack of time spent together), affection, sex, poor communication, anger, the inability to resolve conflicts, resentments, jealousy, trust, control, power struggles, blame, substance use or misuse, threats, withdrawal, boundaries, honesty and respect are the subjects that are most commonly addressed in premarital counseling.
How Do We Choose a Premarital Counselor?
Premarital Counseling helps couples prepare for a healthy marriage, giving them the opportunity of creating a solid, steady and fulfilling relationship. Of all the mental health specialists that offer their services as premarital counselors—psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers, licensed professional counselors—the only professionals who are trained exclusively as relationship specialists are Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists. If you want pre marriage counseling, you want a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.
Does Premarital Counseling Offer Lasting Benefits?
Two people enter a marriage with different personalities, temperaments, skills, values, childhood role models and previous relationship experiences and baggage. If the two of you don’t find a premarital counselor who can assist you with blending your personalities, desires, experiences and improving your relationship skills, you have the wrong pre marriage counselor.
How Much Experience Does Neil Rosenthal Have in Premarital Counseling?
Neil Rosenthal is in his 36th year as a specialist in helping couples to understanding what is going wrong in their relationship, how to deepen their relationship and how to repair the problems in their relationship. Neil does premarital counseling, pre engagement counseling, marriage therapy, couples therapy and family therapy.Schedule a premarital counseling appointment today