This is a preview. The full article appears in Neil's book: Love, Sex and Staying Warm: Creating a Vital Relationship

Erotic talk, called “verbal foreplay” by Bonnie Gabriel in the book The Fine Art Of Erotic Talk (Bantam Books), is about talking in sensuous ways that generate passion between you and your lover.

Here are some Gabriel suggests that you can add erotic talk to spice up your intimate relationship:

Learn the art of “erotic subtext.” If you “sensualize” expressions, that is, use words that evoke a sense of physical or emotional connection to your partner, your words will become especially potent. And remember to use all of your senses. For instance, you may give your partner an honest compliment like “I love the way you dance.” But you can help to create a more romantic or erotic mood with expressions like “I love the way you feel in my arms” or “I love the way you move your body.”

You can express your enjoyment of how your companion sounds by saying “Your voice excites me.” “Keep talking to me that way.” In the visual realm, you might tell your partner “I love looking at you,” ” You make that dress look fabulous,” “When you look at me like that, I begin to melt.”

Don’t forget to notice if you’re attracted to your partner’s scent. You might say something like “I love your perfume,” or “I like your cologne,” although a more sensual way of putting it would be “I love the way you smell,” or “Your skin has the nicest perfume; I could breathe you in like this all night.”

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