Note: This is the second of two-part series.
The following is a continuation of the traits that are associated with flourishing and thriving in life. This list was stimulated by the book Flourishing (Edited by Corey Keyes and Jonathan Haidt, American Psychological Association). These traits give people the inner experience of well-being and are associated with a life well-lived:
- Finding a sense of meaning in your life’s tasks and day to day work. Entering a state of vital engagement with tasks you undertake and able to be fully absorbed in an activity that challenges your abilities. Gaining a feeling of achievement, mastery, enjoyment, meaning and purpose from what you do.
- Intimacy. Having successful close relationships. Letting other people in. Developing and maintaining deep and mutually gratifying relationships. Feeling vitally attached and engaged with others. Engaging in conflict-reducing and repaired-oriented communication when there is conflict, hurt or anger. Pro-relationship responses rather than ones that are anti-relationship.
- Affection. Expressing closeness and connection not just with your words or deeds, but also through touch.
- Shared fun. Joint participation in novel, stimulating, arousing and/or joyful activities. Participating in and enhancing the sense of “we”ness through enjoyable and mutually satisfying activities.
- Kindness. Being kind, compassionate, empathetic, giving and helpful to other people and/or to other forms of life.
- Integrity. Saying what you mean and meaning what you say. Acting with honor and honesty in your dealings with the world. Both you and others can trust your words, agreements and promises. The opposite of B.S. .
- Civility. The opposite of anger, revenge, hostility and mistrust. Civility moves you out of defensiveness and arguing, and into a more creative and tolerant mindset in which you get along with and work harmoniously with others.
- Optimism. Dwelling on the hopeful and the possible far more than the hopeless and the negative. Looking at the silver lining in disappointments and seeing your cup as half full rather than half empty.
- Spirituality. Living your life orientated around the sacred. Concerning yourself with ultimate purpose, ethics and commitment to a higher power. Seeking the divine in daily experience.
- Creativity. Having an outlet for your uniqueness through self-expression. Creating something that is uniquely you.
- Vitality. The sense of feeling fully alive (rather than half dead.) Having something to live for, and looking forward to tomorrow.
- Openness to personal growth, self-betterment, new people and new experiences. Openness to self-improvement and being a better version of you.
- Generally feeling pleasant and positive emotions, rather than negative or unpleasant emotions.
- Positive self-esteem. Believing in yourself, and acting on that belief with life-affirming positive behaviors, actions and activities. Being on your own side without having to be against anyone else. Liking, trusting and accepting yourself.
Has your relationship turned cold and distant? Neil’s book Love, Sex, and Staying Warm can help you rekindle your passion.Get My Book Today →